Headline Archives for March 24, 2005

Gun Guys News

• FL:  Ladies and Gentleman, Shoot 'Em if You Got 'Em!  Florida Senate Unanimously Votes to Turn State Into Free Fire Zone.  Because Miami Just Wasn't Dangerous Enough.  (3.24)
• FL:  Florida Decrees "Dueling" the Official State Sport.  Funeral Home Directors Across the State Rejoice.  (3.24)
• FL:  Fun With Oxymorons:  As NRA Death Mongers Applaud the Florida Free Fire Bill, NRA Supporters Stand Outside Terri Schiavo's Hospital to Defend "Culture of Life." (3.24)
• Columnist Asks the Question Dubya and his Ilk Will Never Answer: "Does the 'Culture of Life' Extend to Victims of Gun Violence?"   (3.24)
• TN: Lawmakers Protect Citizen's Constitutional Right to Carry a Concealed Weapon Into a Bar.  Nervous Drinkers Tell Barkeep "Why Don't You Make That a Double..." (3.24)
• Q: With All These Gun Massacres Recently, Whatever Happened to Common Sense Gun Control? A:  The Same Thing That's Getting Ready to Happen to Liability for Gun Manufacturers.. (3.24)
• John Lott Knows That School Shootings Only Occur Because Students, Faculty, Janitors, Administrators, and Anyone Else We Forgot To Mention Aren't Packing Heat... (3.24)
• ...Though In Related News, John Lott "Research" Is So Spotty Media Watchdogs Can't Fathom Why People Still Publish This Hack Cross Dresser's Rantings.  (3.24)
• UK: In Britain, a Child is Killed By An Air Gun, So They Regulate Them.  In America, 30,000 Die Each Year Due to Gun Violence, and We De-regulate Them.  (3.24)
• PA: Philadelphia Desperate For Gun Regulation After Recent Wave of Shootings.  Rural Voters Say "Let Them Eat Lead."  (3.24)

America's Shooting Gallery

• MN: As Details Emerge About the Red Lake School Massacre, A Community Tries to Pick Up the Pieces.  This Story Brought to You By Guns: Making Murder a Cinch Since the 1300s.. (3.24)
• IL: Man Gives "Take This Job and Shove It" New Meaning.  Shoots One Supervisor, Takes Another Hostage at Gunpoint. (3.24)
• IN:  What's Worse Than One School Shooting in a Week?  Two.  (3.24)
• MI: Ooops.  Make that Three. (3.24)
• IN:  Didn't Jim Fix Already Teach Us That Jogging Is Seriously Hazardous to Your Health? (3.24)
• IL: Today's Bar-Argument-Ends-In-Gunfire Story Comes From Chicago.  Strange How People Who Deal With Gun Violence As a Fact of Life Favor Gun Control.  (3.24)
• NC: Man Waxes Pregnant Cousin, Her Twin Brother, and Roommate.  Police Say Shooter is "Nothing if not Thorough." (3.24)
• CT:  Man Shoots Neighbor Who Had Helped Him Care for An Elderly Relative.  Claims It Was "Just His Way of Saying Thank You."  (3.24)
• CO: Old and Busted: The Guy At the Party With a Lampshade on his Head.  New Hotness: The Guy At the Party With a Handgun and a Bad Attitude.  (3.24)
• MI: Man Accidentally Shoots Himself While Cleaning Gun.  Common Sense Surrenders.  (3.24)