Headline Archives for May 6, 2005

Gun Guys News

• CA:  The Minutemen Militia, Coming Soon to Scenic San Diego.  From the State That Brought You the Governator.  (5.6)
• TN:  Project Offers Free Gun Locks to Parents.  The Same Gun Locks the NRA Doesn't Want To Become Mandatory, Presumably Because Of Their Staunch Support of Population Control.  (5.6)
• OH:  Panel Debates Whether Citizens Have the Right to Know Who is Packing Concealed Weapons.  Ohio Declares ".357 Magnum Surprise" As Official State Food. (5.6)
• TN:  NRA Turn On Their Own, Attack Gun Supporting Legislator For Thinking, Like 85% of his Constituents, That Maybe Guns and Alcohol Don't Mix.  (5.6)
• ME:  .50 Caliber Sniper Rifle, Assault Weapons Ban Advances in Maine.  Terrorists Cry Foul.  (5.6)
• FL:  First You Allow Everyone To Own A Gun.  Then You Allow Them To Use Them Whenever on Whoever They Like.  Just Sit Back, and Watch Civility Disappear. (5.6)
• FL:  Florida's "Eminem Act of 2005" Gives People the Right to Imitate His Song From Eight Mile. " You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow [away anyone you want]."  (5.6)
• FL:  Canadians Ponder Why American's Are So Unbelievably Blood Thirsty.  Come On Guys!  What Are We Supposed to do With All These Guns?  (5.6)
• Federal Anti-gun Program Has Netted Over a Hundred Felons Who Were Packing Heat.  Presumably Still Plan to Ignore Straw Purchases.  Nothing Like Treating the Symptom and Ignoring the Disease, Eh?  (5.6)
• Tom DeLay and the Mafia.  Both Gun-Crazed.  Both Manipulate the Political System For Their Gains.  Both Are Exterminators.  (5.6)

America's Shooting Gallery

TX:  When Picking a Gun Fight Police Remember To Bring a Gun Along.  I Mean, It's Not Like They're Hard to Come By!.  (5.6) GA:  Milk Man Arrested For Packing Heat on School Grounds.  Nothing Like Creamy, Delicious Milk From a Jail Cafeteria. (5.6) MI:  Of Course He's Not the Only One Bringing Guns to School.  (5.6) IN:  Because Those Things Bring You Even More Street Cred Than an Ipod!  (5.6) NC:  It's the Latest Craze.  Students Use It To Protect Themselves From Dangerous Aggressors Like AP Test Proctors.  (5.6) MO:  Sometimes They Even Bring Magical Guns to School, Capable of Disappearing Into Thin Air. (5.6) TX:  Disgruntled Oil Attorney Kills Boss, Himself.  Who'd Have Thought Oil Attorneys Weren't Upstanding Citizens! (5.6) CA:  Man Leaves Loaded Gun In Fanny Pack at Restaurant.  In Other News, People Still Wear Fanny Packs.  (5.6) TN:  Two Men Arrested for Gun Theft.  Thousands Get Away With It Every Year.  (5.6) IN:  Authorities Decide That It's Not a Crime to Point a Gun At An IRS Agent.  Jeez...No One Likes These Poor Guys.  (5.6)